Life's Gumbo

Life's Gumbo: How Much of Yourself Are You Editing to Be Heard?

Life's Gumbo: How Much of Yourself Are You Editing to Be Heard?

We are taught that good communication means knowing our audience and considering how a message will land. For Black people and others from marginalized communities, that can quietly become something more: the constant work of softening, translating and editing ourselves so other people can receive us comfortably. This reflection explores the difference between strategic adaptation and self-erasure — and what it means to know when the adjustment is serving you and when it is costing you.

Life's Gumbo: My Auntie Used to Say, “F*** ’Em and Feed ’Em Fish and Beans.”

Life's Gumbo: My Auntie Used to Say, “F*** ’Em and Feed ’Em Fish and Beans.”

Everybody gets to choose. One of the hardest lessons of adulthood is accepting that other people's choices don't belong to us. A reflection on boundaries, healing, and learning to let go.